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(PHOTO: Stephen Dunn/Getty Images)

The following story appeared in the January 31st issue of Puq Magazine.

It’s an age-old question about age-old players — how long after their play begins to decline does their team have an obligation to keep paying them for their services?

For the Anaheim Ducks, it’s a question that has never even crossed the minds of management when Teemu Selanne is the subject of conversation.

It’s hard to believe we’re already on the third issue of our magazine, yet here it is! It’s got a brand new name, but all the same great content you’re used to reading. Starting this month, we’re providing access to read it (along with back issues) online via Issuu (although we’d recommend downloading them yourself as Issuu seems to have trouble displaying some of our content). If you want to access them the old fashioned way, check out the Puq Hub. We’re also launching a sister Twitter account for the magazine, where you can funnel all your suggestions, sexual harassment complaints and cashier’s cheques: @puqmag.

What’s in this great issue? Without spoiling too much, we cover the Winter Classic, the World Junior Hockey Championship, the Ducks’ recent turnaround and there’s even a handy February calendar marked with the schedule and a few other important Ducks dates.

Hope you all read it and enjoy it. Thanks for being such a great community.

(PHOTO: Victor Decolongon/Getty Images)

Playoffs? Don’t talk about ­— playoffs?! You kidding me?! Playoffs?!

In so many words: yes, with a couple of caveats.

By now, most sports fans are familiar with that particular rant, unleashed by football coach Jim E. Mora when asked about his team’s chances of making the playoffs. We have not to-date  — unfortunately — seen Bruce Boudreau go on a similar tirade, but perhaps that’s for want of the appropriate question. More likely, it’s because we fans have simply refused to acknowledge the thought ever since the Ducks hit rock-bottom around Christmas.

That was just fine by me, by the way. Numbing myself to the idea of the Ducks sliding out of the playoff picture helped deal with the reality and had me looking forward to a lottery pick in what’s expected to be a deep draft this June.

This story was originally published in the December 23 issue of Devil’s Advocate.

Doomsday is upon us all. Or maybe not. It depends on who you ask. For the first time in almost two decades, the NHL is restructuring its teams in an effort to placate the masses (which in this case means the networks, the players, the owners, the fans and just about anybody else who invests time or money in the sport).

It’s a little axiomatic to say any decision that aims to please everybody ends up pleasing nobody, but it rings especially true when it comes to a hot topic like scheduling in professional sports leagues. Invariably, some teams, comfortable in their current situation, will be resistant to the idea of change, while others will welcome it with open arms.

The second issue of Devil’s Advocate is here! This holiday edition is packed (packed!) with awesome stories, pictures and news from across the Anaheim Ducks universe.

Among the highlights:

• Team report cards: We look back on the first half of the season and rank the Ducks players for their performances.
• Shake up: How NHL realignment impacts on its teams — most importantly, the Ducks.
• Towels are invading: The story of a Ducks fan who brings orange to world-famous landmarks.
• Hiller’s got another new mask: Three-page spread complete with gorgeous, full-bleed photos of Jonas Hiller’s new cage, courtesy Airxess.
• Holidays are here: Santa’s naughty list, Ducks secret Santa and more!

Click the link above to unwrap the gift you’ve all been waiting for, or check out the Hub here.

(PHOTO: Harry How/Getty Images)

A scapegoat is a wonderful thing to have. Portraying yourself as somebody else’s scapegoat is even better. In that regard, the Ducks want to have their cake and eat it too.

There’s a certain romanticism to playing the victim. It avoids the unpleasant reality of owning the ultimate responsibility for your actions and their consequences.

That romantic notion, as it were, has become part of the fabric of the culture that surrounds the team. The current iteration of the Anaheim Ducks (i.e. post-lockout) has built its reputation on toughness — or hooliganism, if you ask the rest of the league. The consequence of rough and tumble hockey is an increased risk for penalties and suspensions, something to which the Ducks are no strangers.

(PHOTO: Harry How/Getty Images)

Not much needs to be said. If you want to see what rock bottom looks like, click the image below.

Click to enlarge.

So here’s a bit of exciting news. Today I’m pleased to present the first in what I hope is a long series of e-magazines exclusive to Quacked.

What is it, exactly? A brief look at the goings on in the world of the Anaheim Ducks (and our own blogosphere) from the past couple of weeks. Most of the content has already been published on Quacked, but is aggregated and presented here in a format that’s ideally suited to longer reading sessions (e.g. when you’re on the— um, let’s say throne).

What are you waiting for? Dive right in by clicking the link above or going to the new hub we’ve set up for it.

(PHOTO: Jeff Gross/Getty Images)

Today we’re introducing a new feature series on Quacked that we call Devil’s Advocate. Designed to mimic the venerable roundtable sports discussion — only without the physical presence of a round table — it should allow us to shed some light on current issues surround the Anaheim Ducks.

In our inaugural discussion, Alex and I examine the Bobby Ryan trade rumor mill, assess the effect of Jason Blake’s absence on the team’s juju and debate whether Jonas Hiller should be escaping accountability for his slow start.

Click to view Devil’s Advocate, Issue 01

Click here to view the Devil’s Advocate index

(PHOTO: Martti Kainulainen/AFP/Getty Images)

Let’s cut right to the chase: a price will have to be paid if the Anaheim Ducks want to right their ship. The discussion no longer revolves around a speculative “if”, but an inevitable “when” and “for whom” the bell will toll.

The candidates gallery has a plethora of worthy scapegoats. Randy Carlyle, whose message his players are apparently tuning out, should be at the top of the heap.